There could be any number of reasons why you’ve developed low confidence or low self-esteem. It can be due to a life event that has knocked your confidence and/or changed your outlook. Or maybe you lack of belief in yourself and feelings of not being good enough started from when you were a child. If you never feel good enough, you’re more likely to stay unfulfilled in relationships, your career and life in general. You might already know that you suffer from low confidence. The good news is there is something you can do about it. But before that, let’s explore the 7 signs you need a confidence boost, that you might not be aware of. Awareness is the first step of change, of improving your self-confidence and finding the inner strength to pursue a different way of living.
Self-Confidence is essential for a healthy, happy life
You Apologise A Lot
People with low self-esteem often suffer from a faulty self-image, or low self-worth. This means you may think that everything that goes wrong is somehow your fault. Do you apologise even if you haven’t got anything to apologise for? Perhaps someone bumps into you but it’s you that says sorry? Next time you catch yourself apologising, question yourself whether you’ve done anything wrong.
You Don’t Accept Compliments
Think back to the last time someone paid you a compliment, how did you react? Disagree or laugh it off? I’ve heard some people even point out their own flaws as a reply! If someone is complimenting you, learn to accept it is because they genuinely approve of your new skirt or like that report you produced, or whatever it is. Practice just saying “thank you” and owning it!
You Are Overly Concerned with the Opinions of Others
If you have low confidence, you often spend a lot of time on the opinions and thoughts of others. You seek approval to act from them, rather than making a decision based on your values in life. And you wouldn’t dare offer an opinion that was different to theirs! It is time to stop hiding and shine your own light. This checklist gives some ideas and I can’t wait to explore this in more detail in my next blog post.
You Constantly Check Your Phone
When you’re out for the evening and there is a lull in the conversation or when you’re left alone for a minute, do you jump straight to looking at your phone? This only could be a sign you need a confidence boost. Maybe you are not confident enough to think other people would want to talk to you. Instead, see if there is someone you can talk to, even if it is basic small talk, or perhaps use the opportunity to go to the bar to get a drink, this still uses social skills and is a way to boost confidence.
You Have Trouble Making Simple Decisions
If you are low on confidence, it is likely you have trouble making simple decisions and frequently change your mind. This could also relate back being overly concerned with the opinions of others, as you want to be sure they will approve. Make decisions that feel good to you. Be safe in the knowledge of why you made the decision and worry less about people’s responses. Easier said than done, I know. Like all of these things, it takes practice.
You Are a People Pleaser
Are you really quick to yes to other people but maybe not as quick to go after what you want? While it can be beneficial to agree to new opportunities or rewarding to help out a friend, if you are saying yes before you think through what this means for you then it could be a problem. Instead spend time thinking if it agrees with your wants, needs and wellbeing rather than just to please others. That way you both get value from the task or action.
You know I am passionate about promoting the importance of self-care and you can’t pour from an empty cup. Always ensure you are looking after yourself, which in turn means you’ll be able to help other people.
You Feel Like You Don’t Have the Right Skills or Experience
There’s a lot around in the media at the moment about impostor syndrome and that feeling of not being good enough. No one is an expert in everything and we all bring unique skills and experience to whatever we’re doing. Focus on your strengths, rather than what you don’t know.
A useful exercise for this is to create a success list; a list of everything you’ve achieved in your life so far. Don’t rush this, set the right environment where you’re not going to be disturbed, grab a cuppa or a glass of something and write down all of your skills and experience. Then celebrate! Next time you’re having a confidence crisis, go through the list for an instant boost.
The Solution to Boost your Confidence
If you were reading through the signs in this blog post and nodding your head, or holding your hand up and saying “yes, that’s me,” then I’ve got something that might just help. The 10 Tips to Boost Your Confidence is a handy printable to help with your self-development. You can get started today with boosting your confidence and shining that little brighter.
I’ve got more content coming this month on how to be more confident. If you have any questions at this stage, then feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org